What Disgusts Miss Curious?

I spent my entire bus ride this morning wondering if I was leaking blood on the seat. And how I’d have to crawl over the person beside me, so he could see a nice spot on the seat and an even nicer spot of my pantalones. Fucking period. I hate you. Not much disgusts me, but periods, they do. It’s just fucking gross to have blood dripping from your kooch.

As far as I’m concerned, there is nothing good about menstruation. Not one thing. I get all cranky and weird and needy and bloated and crampy and delusional. (Were there any good adjectives in that last sentences? I don’t think so.) AND, I of course over-analyze even more. The Brother isn’t giving me enough of this or that. And I just like being alone. Thank God I’m single so I can hibernate in my room for the rest of my life. I hate everyone. Everyone’s a loser, and I’m so fucking alone.

And fuck those girls from Female Sexuality at Cal trying to tell me periods are great and earthly and natural and to go bleed on a rock. I mean sure I’m somewhat open minded, but bleeding on a rock and saving my period blood ‘cuz it’s good for my plants, I don’t think so. You’re a ho.

Update:

But anyway, nothing’s really happening in my life right now. Except of course the things that I make up in my head and think are real. There’s no movement on The Brother front. I spend 6 nights a week in my own bed. “Friends” pretty much defines us right now. I actually do like my solitude. It’s cool.

I’m finally studying for my Real Estate exam. I have the first half this Sunday and the second half (the more difficult part) on November 30th. I’ll probably fail, but who cares. I’ll keep taking it.

Hm. I’m going to Connecticut in two weeks to visit my lil’ sis in college. I feel kinda’ dull right now. Devoid of feeling. Which is a nice break from my usual psychotic behavior. Hm. I spend most of my time listening to music. My wife calls me and plays Tori Amos clips, and I like it. And what the fuck do I do? What defines me? Why do I fucking care? Hahaha!