WHAT TO MAKE OF THIS?

AS PROMISED, HERE IS THAT EMAIL EXCHANGE... IF YOU HAVEN'T READ "THE GOODS" FROM YESTERDAY'S POST, YOU'LL NEED TO DO THAT TO HAVE ANY IDEA AS TO WHAT THIS IS ABOUT.


THE ENGLISHMAN:

I know you probably won’t want to read this, but I want to let you know that I am very sorry and feel really awful about what I did last Saturday. It was a terrible mistake made in the spur of a moment and not something that I was seeking out to do to you. I wish that I could turn back time and not have done this. However, I can’t, and I did do the most hollow, insensitive thing imaginable and have no excuse for my behaviour.

I really like you and enjoyed hanging out with you so much, but I know that you must hate me and feel hurt. This ordeal has taught me a big lesson. I do not deserve or expect to be forgiven. I just wanted you to know that I’m so, so sorry Miss Curious. (I love the double “so’s”)


MISS CURIOUS:

My feelings are far from being those of hate. More than anything I feel extremely foolish and disappointed. You had no commitment to me, and you were free to be physical with whomever you chose. However, I thought we both had a mutual respect for one another, and I believed common decency would have prevented you from what transpired.

It also stung a bit more when I realized that you had used the protection I'd given you... and I had even said for you not to use them with anyone else... I never in a million years would have thought you really would. Needless to say, I was very surprised, shocked in fact, when I put the pieces together.

What I liked most about you was what seemed to be a kind heart... despite your comments that I merely wanted you for your appearance and sex. It doesn't take me very long to discover how I feel about a person, and I truly liked you.

But in the end, we only hung out a couple of days... certainly not enough time to warrant any hate... it simply revealed another side of your personality that, in the future, I do not foresee a physical relationship... I see no reason why we couldn't be amicable acquaintances.

I do understand you're younger than I and are amidst those uncontrollable boyish sex days, and that's what you were doing that night... I am also to blame for having silly expectations... So yes, you are forgiven. I appreciate your apology.

And, I must ask... what lesson has it taught you?


THE ENGLISHMAN:

You certainly shouldn’t feel foolish although I can fully understand your disappointment. To be honest, I am scared, disappointed, and shocked with myself by how much of a shit I was... I never thought I would do such a thing and know this is not the path for me ever again.
First, I learned that if you like someone a lot, as I do with you, that you can’t just float around and go with the flow whenever you’re drunk and jumped on by someone else.
Secondly, I learned, in the most insensitive horrible way ever, was that I did mean something to you because I wasn’t sure. (Hmm. Interesting)

But mostly, I learned how sad and upset I feel to know that I ruined our friendship/trust and made you feel hurt as if you meant nothing to me (which isn’t true but I really fucked up so I can’t possibly convince you of this). (Hmm… I meant something to him?)

Sorry. I will leave you alone now. Thank you so much for even replying let alone accepting my apology... I’m truly in awe that you could be that forgiving...I honestly won’t forgive myself for a very long time.


MISS CURIOUS:

You're being much too hard on yourself. You made a mistake... it's quite alright. You clearly learned some lessons, and that's the end of it. Your emails seem to be pretty sincere (i hope)... and I really do appreciate it, thank you.

So, you really didn't know that I liked you? I was constantly next to you... I wanted to be... and I listened to every word you said. I didn't think you liked me... well, for anything more than hooking-up/having sex... well, you did like me more than that? Just curious :) (Miss Curious is just Curious, what a fucking surprise!!!)


THE ENGLISHMAN:

Yes I do like you, and I also think you’re really funny (Yes I am!!!)... not at all pretentious unlike most people, and I feel I can relax with you which is a rare thing for me. I wasn’t sure you liked me because when we met in New York, you had a boyfriend, and I didn’t know what the deal was this time really. I think Carine Dion is really mad at me and I might stay out of her way until maybe Christmas! Then, she can have a go at me in front of my mum and grandma… that would be brilliant! (definitely not!)