Let's Get Naked?

(feel free to skip to Boys-boys-boys further down if you don't like my psychotic obsession with the meaning of life)

In my pursuit of happiness, I need to know that we’re not here to merely propagate because all roads lead to such a conclusion.

I saw Feast of Love last week (dee – press – sing)… I’m going to butcher the quote, but it went something like this:

Love is just a trick to get us to make babies.

And then, on like the one station I get (okay, exaggeration, I get a couple, hahaha!), there was that new TV show, The Big Bang. One of the characters snuck into a chick’s apartment to clean her room (yes, totally strange, but not the point)… his roommate tracks him down, and the cleaning dude tells his friend to speak quietly in a low register. He tells him this because women are sensitive to high-pitch sounds so they can awake should their baby need help.

You see, we’re designed to insure our offspring survives.

At Cal, I took an ancient Chinese history class. In it we discussed whether humans were inherently good. The professor seemed to think that we are. He used the example of a woman walking along and seeing a child about to fall into a hole. He said that almost any woman would instinctively run to save the child.

At the time, I thought, “wow, that’s true we inherently do want to help each other.”

But then, I was raised in a pure science home. I ran that scenario by my dad. Here was this professor, at Berkeley, smart dude, who had this example, which seemed pretty uplifting to me. So, my dad says, “well, yes, that still proves my point that we’re here to propagate because woman are programmed with such instincts since would be most likely that that child would be hers. That instinct is not exemplary of true goodness… it’s just the selfish gene that fuels a woman to take such actions.”

Dee-Press-Sing!!!

I want to know that our existence isn’t merely to propagate. I want to know that we’re not that basic. At this point, I see us like viruses that evolve to become resistant to whatever antibiotics that have been developed.


BOYS- BOYS -BOYS - AND MISS CURIOUS THE HO!!!

Well, I already got my answer as to who my next kiss would be. Unfortunately, the kiss came with such force that I didn’t get to enjoy the breath exchange right before it. His tongue hit my mouth and his lips followed.

Skim this post for details on him:
http://lilmisscurious.blogspot.com/2007/09/miss-curious-and-optimism-in-dating.html

I’d put off calling Antonio back because I felt like I was cheating on Bam, but Bam doesn’t want to be with me. So, I have to move on.

He came over when he got off work. He sat across the room in my over-sized chair. We smoked a bit and had some drinks. Then, we had what I like to call “Real Time” where we acknowledge that everything we’re about to say will be the complete truth.

He then divulged his life story… his insecurities, fears, what he wants to work on, how he thinks people perceive him. He’s two years younger and in dude years that’s like 6 years of maturity he needs to catch up on… sorry dudes!

I appreciated his honesty, immensely. It was fascinating and refreshing. I divulged just a bit because I’m actually Queen of Questions. I have a huge miss CURIOUSity.

We both said huge “wows” and that we’d make great friends.

A half hour later, he reached for a lighter on my desk where I’d been sitting. He then said, “I don’t want to be friends.”

He bent over and kissed me. I was taken by surprise. Since he came in with such a forceful tongue, I wasn’t quite enjoying myself.

I feel like the forceful tongue is something people work up to…work up to in the first kiss, fine… but not off the bat.

Then, however, I lost myself in it. I gave myself up to his fucking passionate as fuck kiss, and when he stopped, my eyes opened as widely as they’re capable of… those eyes of mine were both dizzy and screamed, WOW!

He went back to his side of the room, and we talked for a while until I hopped onto my bed, and he immediately followed. The making out ensued.

He’s very aggressive in the making-out department. He’s VERY sexual… like he wouldn’t get grossed out about anything, and he would be totally open to anything. We had a lot of boobage action, and he kept saying, “Let’s get naked!”

Um, NO WAY!!!

I really wasn’t into doing much, so things didn’t go very far despite his serious attempts.

Anyway, he moves out of the state at the end of November, and I’m thinking this really could be a fun fling.

However, he said he’d call yesterday and of course, didn’t. The thing is, I really don’t care that much. When I know something’s not going anywhere, I don’t really invest myself.

I DO NOT want to sleep with the dude. I’m such a STD hypochondriac, and a fling frankly isn’t worth the worry.

Perhaps he’ll call… perhaps he won’t, but I now have a kiss I can replay in my head again and again and my stomach drops every time.