A Quest For Inspiration.

Uninspired. Feeling rather forlorn for no particular reason.

I’ve been going out just as much… live shows, just as much… drinking, just as much… toking, not as much… and now I’m living in complete apathy.

Of course the Pete Yorn itty-bitty moment of up close hotness was nice… but fleeting… and then, Friday night I went to a photography exhibition and oddly stayed out until almost 3 am.

Miss Curious and Giving Out Her Telephone Number:

I have a hard time saying no if someone asks for my phone number. I don’t want to hurt his or her feelings. Of course, in the long run, it’s worse because you give the person false hope. This sounds a bit, well, awful of me, but I just get caught off guard.

Friday night, this crazy cab driver, roughly my age, asked for my number. I was stunned. We’d just gone at it about racial diversity and economic status amongst the major U.S. cities. It was 2:30-3ish AM… I was rather tipsy.

Feeling pissed at this cab driver, who should have known better, I was completely taken aback when he asked for my number. I gave it to him. BIG MISTAKE!!!

A half hour later, um 3:30 am, he calls, “I just wanted to make sure you gave me the right number. What are you doing right now?”

“Sleeping. Good-Bye.”

One morning later, Sunday, the sound of my phone buzzing against my new old nightstand woke me up. 8 am. It was him. I didn’t answer. 8:30 am as I was falling back to sleep. Another buzz. It was him. 9 am. It was him. I still didn’t answer.

I put the fucking phone on silent.

2 hours later I wake-up. I decided I had to end this… so I text, “I was too drunk the other night to mention that I have a boyfriend… and it’s serious. Sorry.” I don’t typically lie, but this crazy warranted it fully.

That fucking asshole had the gall to text back, “You must be confusing me with someone who’s… interested.”

Whatever you stupid motherfucker… fuck you… you’re crazy… who calls in half-hour intervals starting at 8 am on a Sunday fucking morning… who the fuck does that?!?!?!??!?!

I wanted to text back a gazillion scathing remarks… but of course, he knows where I live and clearly, he’s NUTS!!! I left it at that and remained pissed.

This is actually the 3rd of its kind in the last 3 months. One of the prior 2 was from a girl. A girl I met in the bathroom at a bar. We chatted about music. A nice chat. She finds me at the bar later… asks me for my phone and calls her number (I always fall for that one!). I get a text the next day, “nice meeting you.” Later that day, another text… the next day, another text. I text back, “I’m going out of town for the holidays. I’ll give you a shout when I get back.”(that was truth, I was going out of town for Christmas) Before I get back, she texts again. Then she leaves a message, “girl where are you?” That was just too many calls. I never called back. The texts finally stopped.

A couple of weeks ago, I was at this DVD release party. Some guy with a Flock of Seagulls haircut approached me. Bought me a drink. We chatted for a minute. I’m nice. My phone’s on the bar. He takes it. Calls his number. I couldn’t react because I was choking on his excessive cologne. Please note to all men out there, moderation… learn to apply cologne moderately. Please.

He called a few days later. Kept talking about all the drugs he was on that DVD night… said I was the best part. And, kept talking. Friendly enough, but no. I never called back.

Anyway, psycho cab driver freaked me the fuck out, so I’m using this blog as evidence when I’m shot dead in front of my apartment building.

Hahaha!

To Conclude:

I will try to write more consistently again. I will look for inspiration… somewhere. Yes, need inspiration… a little scared that I won’t find it. Scared, indeed.