I Got Nothin'

So really. I always need something going on... something to keep my mind from thinking about why the fuck the Big Bang happened... needed to happen... and when I have no distractions, it's bad news for Miss Curious because she'll start thinking waaaaaaaay too much.

Let's see. Tall K's going on vacation for 3 weeks, which means my drinking will cut down significantly as will my social calendar... well, maybe not the social calendar.

Fuck. I wish I had some fuck relationship. Some NSA as they call it, no strings attached shit. I wish Flava Flav wasn't such a waste... I wish things hadn't gotten complicated there... it coulda' been fun.

Bleh.

Now what?

Damn.

I'm still at work waiting for my ride to some wine bar where we drink our woes away... where we wonder why the fuck we lose sleep over our jobs and can't get a good ole' regular fuck.

I go to bars and shows and dinners and gatherings, and I have the same conversations again and again.

Can you tell I'm so fucking bored and writing complete stream of consciousness ridiculousness?

On my iTunes, See-Line Woman, Nina Simone

I still think about iBartender. I think about him because for some reason I think I always need to be thinking about someone... again, something else other than the meaning of life or lack thereof.

I think about him now in the beginning stages of some fun relationship where they want to see each other all the time... and get all giddy and shit... and I think about how it would've been cool to have been me... and not her.

I blame it on my freckles and bust.

But then, he was younger than me (or I?)... his age showed often. That's what I have to hold onto to forget about his punkass. Bleh.

And I hate all my clothes. I wish I had tons of money to buy new clothes. Damn.

What else?

Hm.

I've now pretty much decided against grad school... I decided it's too huge of a conflict of interest... yeah, trying to convince people that things matter... that they'll find their "purpose." Borrrrrrrrrrring!

Um.

I need a new goal. What oh what could be my new goal? Goal - distraction... I need somethin', and I got nothin'!!!

Silly me. Typical.