They Always Come Back
Getting “let go” by some chump, the need for retribution is inevitable. Since I’m so fucking mature, I just rip him to pieces on my blog and feel vindicated in some way or another. But in my life, I have had some good luck in this department… The Chumps, they always come back… when you least expect it… they come back, and you get that REAL vindication… they come back because they realize that they just passed up the fucking best thing they could ever have – that’d be me, not like it was in question, hahaha!
Saturday night as I was smearing make-up on my face for the evening’s mayhem, I received the following texts – from none other than the infamous JESUS:
Jerk-Off Jesus: Miss ya.
(hmm… I don’t recognize that number… shit… I do have a suspicion)
MiSS CuriouS: ?
Jerk-Off Jesus: Miss hangin out. I thought you were cool. Coolio.
(ok… I think I know who it is… someone pretty lame would say cool – coolio…. And what the fuck? We hung out ohhh --- TWICE!!!! Twice does NOT breed “miss hanging out”)
MiSS CuriouS: I am cool… Thanks :-) (this was my way of not asking questions… not looking to continue the texting)
Jerk-Off Jesus: I do miss you though. But you prolly (yes spelled ‘prolly’) hate me.
(again, with the “miss you” – are you fucking kidding me??? AND hate would give him too much credit – the text back to him, in my head would have been, “I don’t hate you… I just don’t care” but instead…)
MiSS CuriouS: I hung out with you twice… that’s not enough time to hate someone.
(that was me trying to be the bigger person)
Jerk-Off Jesus: I suppose you are right. What are you up to tonight?
(then, I the immature side of me thought, “why the fuck am I even replying? The second I figured out it was him, I should have stopped”…. So I didn’t reply… why be the bigger person? I’ll make him feel as fucking retarded as I did.)
(Some time passes, and he Mr. Insecure couldn’t take it…..)
Jerk-Off Jesus: OK… I thought maybe we could be friends. Thought maybe we could go out and have fun.
(okay, really… this guy has got to be fucking kidding me?!?!? Now I just feel sorry for the guy… I decide that I can be somewhat mature after all.)
MiSS CuriouS: Sorry I have been running around my Apt Getting ready to go to a birthday party… I was going to reply (lie!!!)… the hair dryer was stuck to my ear :-)
Jerk-Off Jesus: yeah maybe another time…
(Puhleeeaaazze!!! Why in the world would I want to hang out with him again?!?!?! We have NOTHING in common… I should have written “we can hang out if you start drinking, going to live music, and getting some fucking self confidence…” and then I really really wanted to throw in, “and bring another one of those Converse coupons!!!!” but instead….)
MiSS CuriouS: yeah maybe…
Needless to say… Interesting. Very Interesting.
ON ANOTHER NOTE:
In some sick fucked up way of wanting to get back at Jerk-Off Jesus at the beginning of the month, I posted my “I’m a Fake… Sometimes” (in reference to faking an orgasm with him) on MySpace… just those little blog blurbs that no one really ever notices, but I thought maybe just maybe, he’d read it and feel like an ass… but that was then… that was when I cared.
Like everything I do, my plan backfired… Instead, The Brother read it… I went to the movies with him last night, and he said he had to take a couple walks around the block and remind himself that we weren’t together anymore. He says he’s totally cool w/ it now – and he’s been dating a girl from work for a couple of weeks… be reminded, I posted that entry while he has been dating her… basically, she’s 2nd best!!! Hahaha!
I know this girl… I know most of the folks at his work because – ohhhhh.... he works at the restaurant next door. When I first met her, I inquired more about who she was… I noticed the “up and down” eyes she had on me. I told him, “dude, that girl totally digs you…” he genuinely replied, “no way… we’re totally just friends.”
Low and behold… I was right… she did like him and now they’re hangin’ out. I’m actually really happy for him… but what I’m getting at is --- a Woman knows these things – she knows when some chick is eyeing her man – she knows when a chick is givin’ her the once – twice – or three times over!
So, after the movie, The Brother and I parted ways… as I was climbing the bus stairs he shouted, “I promise I’ll stop crushing on you!”
Aw. But who can ever stop that. They always come back.
posted by MissCurious @ 12:20 PM
4 comments
4 Comments:
LOL! Jesus! Came back! Clueless. So sad.
Okay, this so HITS HOME with me. Back in the 'day'(okay, so it was like 1999ish?) I was dating this guy for a couple of years, let's call him AA. AA and I were out at a bar in the latter part of our two year dating sting, and this girl,a friend of a friend who was dating one of his best buddies...(yes, this is the south= rednecks) anyway - we were out one night and I tell him that this chick, let's call her L, was so digging him. In fact, at one point in the night someone was hitting on me (I was young & cute then)and she pissed me off for even commenting at how my AA was so sweet to come to my rescue...I can't explain it but this shit was so blatant to me -but he seemed to have NO CLUE. and I had a total insecure whiney girlfriend complex that night. So the moral of the story is - about four or so months later he and I broke up. I moved away and then moved in with his parents for reasons that have slipped my mind mere weeks later (Christmas)- The day I moved back in, his mother sat me down to tell me that AA had rebounded very quickly, and started seeing a young lady (a few years his senior) named "L". I instantly knew that bitch had got my man! Anyway, L and AA were engaged just six months later and today they live happily ever after in the same town with two little boys. Uhh.. not that I'm a total psyco stalker to know that information (ha ha, I actually even know their home address as my mother is a mobile notary, and did a closing across the street a few months ago and needed a witness so the neighbor was the natural choice.. and who comes to the door but dear AA) - freaking SOB. And he thought it was all in my head that night?? Ya, I so needed some closure to that shit. That feels so much better.
c.
Can you please, please send me his phone number so I can send him an anonymous text message with the basis idea of "“we can hang out if you start drinking, going to live music, and getting some fucking self confidence…”
I have the international cell phone thing going for me, so he won't be able to trace the call!
p.s. I was scrolling down the "anonymous" comment and kept seeing "AA" come up. I was thinking, "shoot- i know we're all alcoholics here, but this really isn't the forum for preaching your abstinence!"
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