Dirty, Dirty Sex

Here is my dad's email responding to mine from yesterday:

It appears to be part of the male reproductive strategy to "sow seeds" widely, but make a special effort to see that at least some of the offspring grow up to reproductive maturity. Thus, the female tries to determine if the interested male is only in the sowing frame of mind, or if he has chosen her as "the one" he has selected for a more substantial ongoing investment of resources.


Hmm, so a man really can have a monogamous nature, but only after sowing his oats. Seems like there is . Interesting.


EMBARRASSING:

Yesterday at work I received a MySpace message from a dude I hung out with about 3 years ago. I haven't talked to him in over a year as he's had a girlfriend, and our rendezvous's ceased.

The subject says:

I had a dream...

Email:

about the dirty, dirty sex we used to have. It was good. (dirty, dirty in the sense that we had good chemistry and pushed each other around... and that, he loves my BJ's w/ a whole-lotta' spit... nothing one might gather from such a description)

So, we had some guy visiting our office trying to muster up some business. I've met him a few times before from having done business with him. He comes up behind me and says, "what are you up to?"

He read my email. (what the fuck?)

And said, "oh my god... no," as he covers his eyes, turns around, and walks away. I turned beet RED!!!

Part of me hoped he hadn't read it until the owner of the company overheard me telling someone about my humiliation. He caught the biz associate's name and said, "oh hey, what happened with him. While I was on the phone with him this morning, he asked what the laughing in the background was. I told him it was Miss Curious laughing."

The biz associate then replies, "whatever you do don't look over her shoulder."

Owner of my company, "what do you mean?"

"Oh nothing - nothing." The owner dismissed it until he hears someone near me laughing and using the biz associates name.

Bright Red Again!!!

He wouldn't leave until we relayed the story. BAD IDEA!!!

The owner of our company time and time again has said, "don't tell me anything you don't want the entire office to know." That is true. He canNOT keep his mouth shut.

Now, we drew a small crowd with the owner saying, "oh did you hear Miss Curious' story?"

Fuck Me!!!

But then, that conversation led to the fetishes of the men in our office. One in particular went into the happenings of his younger years.

Apparently, there's "Fire Play"... a whole process of just barely feeling the heat of the flame... something like candle wax, but riskier, which makes it all the more exciting.

Then he discussed how big the "Saran Wrap" scene is. People enjoy having their entire bodies saran wrapped with holes to breath and see... and a hole for the dick and balls and ass-crack to stick out. Then, the dominant partner has free reign. NUTS!!!

He went on to talk about the bondage - discipline - domination - submission (BDSM) and general sado-masochism. There apparently are entire training sessions on that shit.

WOW!!!

Oddly, I'm kinda' vanilla. I haven't been tied up or blind folded or had anal sex (eeks - ouch!) or role-played or done any golden shower shit.

I guess the grossest thing I've done is lick a dude's ass... in retrospect, I don't understand how I could have done that. It seems pretty gross-o, but then, in the heat of the moment, the story can always be different.

Hahaha!

Anyway... that's been my day. Typical.